Friends You Need

“A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

— Proverbs 18:24 (ESV)

You Are Not Self-Made

You are not self-made, you are shaped by those closest to you. Better said: You are the byproduct of your community. Show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future. Your life will rise or fall based on who you walk with, so choose wisely.

What should you be looking for?

Consistent

True friends are there for you, not just near you. They don’t give you their leftovers, they give you priority. They celebrate with you in the highs and stand by you in the lows. They are consistent. Hospitality and kindness should be extended to all but friendship should be intentional. So, don’t let your life be shaped by people who are only halfway in. Pick your friends not based on charisma but character, consistent character over time.

Candid

True friends tell you what you need to hear, not just what you want to hear. They are committed to your growth, even if it costs them comfort. They speak truth in love, not flattery in fear.

Let’s be honest: most of us don’t have many friends like this because most people care more about themselves than your soul. It shows up in avoidance when you need correction and flattery when you need honesty. Candid friends are open and honest from a place of love.

Compassionate

True friends don’t always change your situation, but they help carry your burden. They don’t just listen to you, they stand under the weight with you. Compassion means suffering with someone. It’s showing up in silence. It’s being present when there are no answers. A faithful friend makes heavy things feel lighter simply by being there.

Christ-like

True friends know Christ and seek to love like him. You don’t get to choose your family, but you do choose your friends. And the best of friends point you to the greatest of Friends: Jesus. Jesus doesn’t love you out of obligation, He chose you. He is the friend of sinners, the Great High Priest who listens to every prayer, and the Savior who went to the cross to prove His love.

Jesus says the most candid thing about you:

“You were so sinful I had to die for you. And yet so loved I was glad to.”

Romans 5:8

Jesus is the friend who never leaves even through death.

The compassionate listener, the consistent presence, and the candid truth-teller. Jesus is our true friend.

If your heart desires this kind of true friendship, then:

Receive the friendship of Jesus by surrendering your life to Him.

Reflect the friendship of Jesus by giving your life to others. To find a good friend, start by being one.

Christ is all

Scott Brooks